The boss raised his voice, the husband undeservedly blamed for something, they faced rudeness on the street. Feel confusion, depression, despair … What to do? Learning to fight back!
Instruction manual
one
To get started, pay attention to the emotions that you experience in a conflict situation. Confusion, uncertainty, fear? Or maybe internal aggression? This is normal, everyone has the right to experience such emotions. But in this situation, they are not constructive. Therefore, the first step to the ability to fight back will be the development of self-regulation.
2
The ability to remain calm and reasonable is a valuable skill that will come in handy in many cases. To do this, start doing auto-training and meditation. Take the situation philosophically, evaluate it on the scale of the universe.
3
Do not forget about humor - this is a good way to get rid of tension and fear of the attacker. Imagine it with a saucepan on your head and noodles slowly sliding over your shoulders or "put" a clown nose on it - in general, use your imagination.
4
Never make excuses. Thus, you only aggravate your situation, and you allow the offender to gain an emotional victory over you. Excuses are a consequence of guilt and a desire to look worthy in the eyes of others. Get rid of guilt, in most cases it is not justified by anything and is the result of "winding up" yourself, and the opinions of others are unlikely to change dramatically. If you make a mistake, admit it and suggest options for how to fix it. But, in any case, no one has the right to accuse you of anything in an unflattering manner.
5
Consider in advance how you can respond to defiant behavior. Prepare universal arguments, and, if possible, specific phrases with which you can adequately get out of the situation. Sliding into mutual insults is not necessary, but at the same time, do not be afraid to offend the attacker - sometimes a sharp enough response is necessary to put a person in place.
6
Humor will also come to the rescue. In order to respond to a caustic remark with an ironic remark, after which it will be pointless to attack you, you need to practice, but it's worth it.
7
Examine your weak points, this is where the blow is often directed. Most often these are hidden complexes or conscious, but not accepted in themselves character traits. Awareness and acceptance of these features removes a strong emotional reaction to taunts, and you gain the ability to soberly assess the situation and adequately respond to the attacker. It is worth noting that the same forces — hidden complexes — are also driving the offender.
eight
And finally, remember: people behave towards you exactly the way you allow them to behave.