Sometimes there are situations when life makes you build relationships with a not quite pleasant person, sometimes with someone who is frankly ill-disposed, shows clear disrespect and even openly hates. For example, a daughter-in-law has to endure the dislike of her husband’s mother or the employee is forced to work with a conflict person. Is there any way to build such a relationship?
Sometimes life confronts us with a person who treats us negatively, and at the same time it is impossible to avoid communicating with him. What steps should be taken to at least mitigate the situation?
Move away from the situation and analyze the reason for the negative attitude towards you
You need to clearly understand why a person is negative or even hates you. At this stage, you will not be able to change the situation, but this information will help to build a different line of your behavior with him.
If negative behavior is associated only with a person’s character, and you accidentally entered the field of his activity, this is one option. If you somehow touch upon something important for him, even if it is his erroneous interpretation, this is a different situation. Understand why a person is so painful. Maybe he is afraid of losing something, being alone, getting less attention?
At this stage, you clearly need to understand the essence of the hostile attitude and try not to relate to this fact.
Your attitude to the situation is one of the most important factors in its development.
The conflict is based on the fact that one participant is hostile, the other somehow allows him to relate to himself, otherwise all hostility would pass by.
Look at the situation remotely. How does it begin, how does it develop, what feelings do all participants experience?
For example, if they start attacking you and making unreasonable charges, you react in the appropriate way - you consider them unfair, take offense (silently or verbally), etc. This is the foundation on your part that supports the conflict and allows it to develop.
Now imagine that in your place there would be a completely different person who would not accept unfair accusations at his own expense, ignore them, not be offended internally by the injustice of the aggressor, but would calmly react to the situation in a positive manner. Try to imagine how such a conflict would develop in the future? He would noticeably fade, and the aggressor, having lost the target, which, allowing him to show aggression, would soon switch to another person.
So, a change in one's own position is able to direct relations in a different direction.
However, this is very difficult to do, because here you have to overcome your habits and attitudes.