Everybody keeps telling you everywhere: “Change!”, “You have a complex character, you need to change!” But how to do that? When it comes to external changes, you make a hairstyle, buy a new dress and shoes, change cosmetics and apply makeup in a different way. But with what is inside you, it’s much more difficult, especially if you haven’t done this before.
Instruction manual
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Do not despair. If you have a firm intention, you can roll mountains.
First, determine what is happening in your life. Are you happy? What prevents you from experiencing joy and happiness? What events are happening in your life?
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Now you need to understand what the situation looks like when you are happy and happy. Imagine perfect yourself. What are you? What qualities do you possess, what do you do, how do you communicate? Who is around you? Is that what you want? If yes, continue to the next step. If not, keep imagining yourself perfect.
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Meanwhile, “what are you now” and “ideal you” is the difference. Determine what you are missing now to achieve a "happy image." Understand what exactly you want to change in yourself or your life and what prevents you from being happy. Perhaps this is some kind of your quality, habit or lack thereof. It is very important not to switch from your qualities to another person, because you decided to change yourself. If we consider that the culprit of what is happening is “different, but not you”, then this is the same as giving responsibility for yourself to an outside person. Only children can do this.
It is important to identify and articulate the qualities that will lead you to success and achieving your goal.
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When the qualities are determined, think about whether there is a person in your environment with these traits? How does he behave, how does he solve such issues? If there is no such person, try to watch the heroes of films or just outsiders on the street.
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Read the literature on the topic you are interested in. Nowadays there is a lot of open information about everything in the world. In a large bookstore you are sure to find the right books. If there is no one to advise you on authors and titles, look on the Internet what people recommend.
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The fastest way to change something in yourself is to contact a specialist. Now there are a lot of training programs where work to achieve goals takes place in a group. You can also contact a psychologist and take individual consultations from him. If it comes to deep-seated internal changes, then it can be very difficult to determine them yourself. In this case, the diagnosis itself is carried out by a psychologist.
If you need to acquire skills, attend workshops on a specific topic, where they will step by step tell you how to develop this or that ability in yourself.