When the stepfather comes into the house, the problem of how to call him becomes one of the paramount. In this case, it all depends on what age the child is, what kind of relationships the children of the wife and her new husband will be able to build, whether they will become friends and how comfortable the life together will be.
The appearance of a stepfather in the family rarely goes smoothly and does not cause difficulties in relations with the wife's children. Well, if there was enough time to make friends or get used to each other. Worse, if the news of global changes in the family coincides with an acquaintance.
Psychologists believe that it is wrong to represent the new husband of mom as a "new dad." Blood dad is alone, regardless of how he treats the child and whether he takes part in his upbringing after a divorce. It is better if, when meeting a stepfather, he recommends himself by name or calls himself uncle + name.
Further development of relations will determine the degree of closeness and trust. The child himself, without coercion and persuasion, will decide how to call him a person who claims to be a father. As you know, not the father who gave birth, but the one who raised and raised.
Why small children easily and quickly call stepfather dad
Kids are very sensitive to the mood of adults. Especially strong connection with mom. And if the mother internally wants the child to call his stepfather a father, the baby responds to this desire and begins to call the new family member dad.
If there is no communication with the father, then this does not cause either doubt or internal conflict. Over time, this treatment becomes habitual, and the child perceives the stepfather as a father. With all the conflicts and contradictions that would arise in the communication of blood relatives of parents and children.
If communication with the father happens regularly, then from time to time the young child has doubts and questions. It is important to explain to the child the situation as adults themselves see it, without causing hostility to any of the popes.
How to call a stepfather to a teenager
Much depends on how the stepfather managed to put himself in the family. Flirting, indulging and teasing will not lead to anything good. The teenager will feel insincerity. And even calling her stepfather a dad, he will stumble all the time before uttering this word. Or learn to cunning, realizing that he has the opportunity to purchase nice bonuses.
In any case, this is not the case when the word "dad" will be spoken out of outburst. Lying and insincerity at any moment can lead to embarrassment or conflict.
It’s good if friendship has developed between the stepfather and the teenager and the question of calling him dad or uncle + name does not play a big role. The main thing is that this is pronounced sincerely and does not cause embarrassment to any member of the family.
Do not extort the word "dad" from yourself in a desire to please mom or earn a gift. You need to call your stepfather as your heart tells you, and at the same time try to build a comfortable or friendly relationship. Not so rarely happens when the stepfather becomes a very close, close person, and it does not matter what his wife’s child calls him.
It may be worth talking frankly with adults to either ask for permission to call the stepfather a dad, or explain why this is unacceptable or undesirable. In any case, the whole family should not live with a load of uncertainty.
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