Mutual understanding between men and women is a complex topic that has been difficult since ancient times. Representatives of the other sex often behave like aliens, and it is not so easy to understand what they are thinking. But if you find out what kind of thoughts men hide, then, perhaps, you will understand them much easier. Knowing exactly how a man thinks, you will be able to competently build a strategy for communicating with him and not be surprised at his sometimes “strange” behavior.
Men make ratings
It is no secret that men are warriors and fighters. They are used to fighting for a place in life, winning the love of women, standing on the career ladder and much more. That is why in their head they always compose their personal rating, build a hierarchy of achievements and qualities, which are used to evaluate not only the actions of others, but also their own. For them, there is a standard of behavior for a real man, and to meet it is the highest goal. It is on this that his self-esteem and opinion of himself depends.
If a man succeeds, then in his own eyes his rating increases, and in strangers, according to the man, too. Friends must match his own ranking position. Not necessarily in the field of career achievements, it may be personal qualities or something else. But the man will not have comrades among those who are significantly behind him in priority areas, considering them losers.
For women, such an assessment does not apply or acts differently. A man evaluates a potential partner by completely different characteristics, so it makes no sense to try to impress him by demonstrating male qualities. A man can translate such a woman into a men's rating, respectively, she loses her position in his female top, after which she is perceived solely as a business partner or a good friend.
If you have achieved much greater success in your career than a man, then so that he correctly evaluates you according to his rating, let him know that his other qualities are important to you: courage, determination, masculinity.
Men do not understand women in the same way as women do men
It is for this reason that it is sometimes so difficult to convey to your beloved some kind of thought, you just speak different languages. It affects the habit of women to speak in hints, expressing most of the meaning in emotionally colored words, rather than logical maxims, as it would be more convenient for a man. Additional details, without which it is difficult for a woman to perceive the whole situation, only distract the man’s attention, he loses its meaning and focuses on trifles that are unnecessary to him. In the end, he generally ceases to understand what they are trying to explain to him.
Do not hint to him that you want more warmth and care. Just say that if he covers you with a blanket, when you fall asleep and forget to hide, you will be pleased. If you want him to give you flowers, also tell him directly. Do not forget to specify which flowers you prefer! The main thing here is not to overdo it. Enough to say once.
Men's memory is completely different
It is time to talk about how memory works for men. Unlike women, who for the most part remember the mood and emotional coloring of events, men remember logical facts. That is why, if you were jealous or offended by him, then as soon as the emotions are gone, you quickly forget and forgive. A man, however, completely forgives only when he logically substantiates for himself the reason why he should forgive. He remembers the essence of the event for a very long time, but the emotional interpretation may change over time.
So, if you flirted with someone, and he was jealous of you, then he will remember what you were doing at that moment, what words were spoken and with what look you gave your interlocutor. You can convince him that your words did not have those emotions that he recognized, but trying to make him forget about this episode does not work.
Men think about relationships several times less than women
The fair sex spend hours reflecting on what his words meant. They worry about how the man perceived them, discuss all the ups and downs of the current romance with friends and mother. But men don’t do that. Relationships occupy much less space in their thoughts.
If a man has a relationship, he enjoys it or experiences unpleasant emotions in this regard. He analyzes how this phenomenon in his life is good for him. This does not mean that he does not care about the development of relations, and he is not ready to do something to improve them. He just takes it all very differently.
To better understand what topics excite men, pay attention to the headlines of glossy men's magazines. There will not be topics about the psychology of relationships, but there will be questions about sex, cars, finances.