If you broke up with your loved one, then life is unlikely to seem like a fairy tale in the next few weeks and even months. But this does not mean that you need to go with the flow and shed tears for years on a failed novel. Help yourself relieve symptoms and overcome grief.
Instruction manual
one
Oddly enough, try to return your loved one. Perhaps you have just had a fight, and despair has already swallowed you. Do not hurry! Take your time to throw his things from the balcony and write angry statuses on social networks! Let the emotions settle down, calm down, weigh the pros and cons. If you are to blame - call after a while and apologize; if he is to blame - also call and offer to talk.
2
If decisions are made, all the unsaid are already proven, and you understand that these relationships no longer have a chance, but still it really hurts, let yourself get sick. You can suppress emotions, but why? From time to time this not taken out fragment in a chest will make itself felt. Take a week timeout. Close at home or fly to the ends of the world
and cry as much as you want. Until the tears run out See photos, indulge in memories. There is only one rule - do not get drunk.
3
A week later, tired of crying. The right thoughts begin to appear in the head. Start living anew, find new meanings, lose weight, grow wiser. But the mood is still unstable, something else unpleasantly aches inside. It is best to arrange spring cleaning during this period. Climb into every corner of your house, throw out all the garbage, all that is superfluous, and return the reminder about the “former” to him, send him to a landfill or put him in a box and hide in the farthest corner. Be merciless to any "ghosts" of this person. By the way, I do not urge you to break computers and phones. There are still options: return, sell, exchange, give to those in need.
4
Start a diary, talk with friends, go to a psychologist and draw portraits of your feelings. Your goal is to be aware of how you feel. Do not forbid yourself to love and "think about him." The more you forbid yourself, the more forbidden thoughts will dominate you. "Yes, it hurts me, yes, I still love, yes, I will find the strength to survive it."
5
When you feel a little better, take stock. What did this relationship give you? What were their disadvantages? What are the advantages? If you still have any grievances, try to forgive them. We are all imperfect. It is possible that you broke someone’s hearts and hardly felt joy from it.
6
Get busy! It is very tempting to lie down in your room and mourn yourself, seizing your bitter share with sweets. But you cried a lot in the first week! Try not to leave time for new tears. Any useful employment will help to be distracted and bring a positive effect. Work for two, attend all sorts of courses, go in for sports, participate in charity events and help others. The best distracting activity is one that requires attention and effort of convolutions, but mopping is better than doing nothing.
7
Pay attention to the advantages of loneliness. Yes Yes! You were not mistaken - pluses! This is free time, freedom of action and freedom of choice. You can get to know yourself better, acquire new skills, correct deficiencies, and understand your desires. You can enjoy what you love without remorse. You do not need to report and come up with excuses for wanting to spend an evening with friends.
eight
The time will come, and you will catch yourself thinking that it was sick. That life brings you pleasure, that all you have is enough or not enough, but already someone else. It was then that, without the burden of past grievances, without the desire to take revenge or prove something, and without comparing the “future” with the “former”, new relationships could begin. Nevertheless, let them develop more successfully than the previous ones!
Useful advice
-Don't get drunk
- Do not try to drown your pain in the arms of another. There is no time for a new relationship!
“No promises to stay friends.” See him with a new girl? Why do you need such a "joy"?
- Avoid reminders. No "your" songs, photos, places and things.
- Do not spy and do not hang on his pages on the Internet.
- Do not make drastic changes and do not make serious decisions in the near future. Very likely to break firewood. This will only aggravate the situation.