“You cannot live in society and be free from society, ” a once-famous politician said. Indeed, a person is forced to rotate among other people all his life, involuntarily obeying the norms and rules adopted by them. Kindergarten, school, higher education institution, work. The larger these groups of people, the more they look like a crowd, where the real "herd instincts" sometimes dominate - with a rigid hierarchy and equally severe rejection of everything that goes beyond generally accepted boundaries. How can a man "survive" in the crowd, remaining himself?
Instruction manual
one
First of all, immediately and clearly indicate the boundaries that cannot be crossed under any circumstances. Neither to you, nor to others. Do not succumb to arguments such as: "It is accepted", "It is so." Remember that you must have your own "head on your shoulders", do not be led.
2
Always remember that you are not a dumb, dumb mechanism, not some kind of “screw”, but a living person, with your rights, habits and outlook on life. If such simple things seem strange, incomprehensible to someone, these are his difficulties, not yours. Do not argue when proving your point.
3
Of course, sometimes you have to compromise and make concessions. This is understandable and natural. But only until then, until it is in insoluble contradiction with your moral values, beliefs. Do not be too malleable, in some situations you need to show firmness of character.
4
Do not respond to provocative attacks like: "Do you need more than anyone else?" or "Are you the smartest?" Just ignore them. Or calmly answer: "At least, certainly not the most stupid!" Do not be afraid to pass for a black sheep. Yes, her fate is always unenviable, but then you will not have to blush with shame for the actual behavior. Always stay human.
5
Moreover, do not fall for cheap tricks: "Are you weak?" or "Yes, you're just afraid!" Reacting to such tricks is simply stupid. Remember: not a single truly intelligent, self-respecting person will get involved in a dubious adventure, will not commit an unworthy act, if only to prove to someone that he is "not weak." Avoid such manipulations.
6
In extreme cases, be prepared for the fact that you have to defend your position by using force. Alas, there are individuals who do not understand another language, and consider manifestations of politeness and restraint as weakness. One way or another, try to solve everything without fists, because you can put a person in place with a word.