Psychologists are asked with different questions. All of them can be attributed to one of the categories: simple, medium, complex, very complex.
Sometimes we encounter difficult situations in life and ask ourselves a question, but should we go to a psychologist? We wonder how much money will have to be paid, but is it worth it? Or maybe we can handle it ourselves? Or by itself resolved? Such questions appear before deciding to consult a psychologist. Moreover, sometimes we really manage ourselves, and some situations are resolved without our participation.
So do we need outside help?
First you need to understand that the human psyche is not a simple and understandable tool. Sometimes, under a simple, at first glance, problem, there are quite complex and difficult to work out reasons, without changing which the problem itself does not go away. The reverse situation is also possible, when a serious difficulty in life is resolved by means of awareness of a simple analysis of possible options for action.
How to understand which problems require a deeper, and therefore laborious, study, and which require less effort.
1. Problems that can be easily corrected and impacted.
Let's start with a simple one. What exactly will practically any competent psychologist help us with?
All fresh, recently appeared difficulties and difficulties in relationships, as a rule, require just support and some balanced decisions, help in finding them or just help in adapting. Whether there is a new difficult circumstance or a new turn in situations or relationships that were previously successful, welcome to the psychologist. It is likely that after 1-5 meetings you will leave the office inspired by your discoveries, willingly to live life to the fullest and enthusiastically solve life puzzles that seemed previously problems.
It is necessary to emphasize the addition: "in situations that are well before this relationship or relationship." If the relationship is not easy and it lasts a long time, then the situation already belongs to another category of problems.
2. Psychological difficulties and difficulties that require some effort to resolve them.
There is a category of psychological problems that cannot be solved so easily. But they are quite amenable to correction.
For example, this is a more complex, confusing relationship in which the client will have to realize something in himself, make some decisions, including difficult ones, to admit to their not always obvious motives and aspirations. You may also have to make efforts to harmonize relations, to limit yourself in something, etc.
Also included in this category are issues of overcoming stress and harmonizing one's psychological state. This also requires some effort, finding information, doing some exercises and some analysis, and understanding yourself.
Achieving goals, analyzing obstacles, developing strategies for achieving it - all this is quite possible to implement with the help of a psychologist, if you make an effort and spend some time.
3. Complex problems requiring deep study and serious efforts.
Sometimes it’s quite difficult to determine from the very beginning which category a problem belongs to. One way to define this is through practical efforts to overcome it. If you have made enough efforts to resolve any difficulty and many have already achieved a result in your situation, it is possible that it was your situation that fell into the category of quite significant psychological difficulties and difficulties.
This can be long-term problematic relationships, dependencies and co-dependencies, negative emotional reactions that cannot be changed in different ways, fixation, psychological trauma, and much, much more.
Not any psychologist will help in these problems, but a really good specialist with experience in such assistance.
In these cases, the reasons can go deep into the subconscious of a person and require deep study. There are negative emotional reactions that occur at a very early age, during the period of intrauterine development, immediately at the time of birth.
Often the cause of the problem situation is the circumstance in the human race. So, Bert Hellinger directly connects some cases of depressions of modern Germans with the cruel acts of their fathers and grandfathers in Nazi Germany.
The underlying causes hidden in the human psyche can be worked out for a long time and is not easy. But you can also deal with them, having already made quite a lot of efforts, both on the part of the client and the therapist.
Sometimes such complex problems require wisdom, a deep understanding, or other life position. Obviously, this comes with time, sometimes over many years. And there is no reason to expect such a major change in a month or two.
Wisdom and mature life position are ripening.
4. Problems that are practically not amenable to psychological correction and impact.
And finally, we will touch upon what the psychologist is unlikely to cope with, of course, if he is not a genius, such as, for example, Milton Erickson.
Here we include all the underlying problems caused by negative character traits that manifest themselves throughout the client’s life and are considered by him as an integral part of his personality.
For example, a strong pessimism, a deep sense of worthlessness or infringement. Strong resentment towards life. Such people have many insoluble problems in all areas of life. Sometimes it seems that such people came here specifically to suffer. If there is a person nearby who is ready to lend a helping hand, sometimes simply for free, then all his attempts are rejected. Such a “client” finds in his hopeless situation some kind of protection and will resist until the very last so that, God forbid, at least insignificant relief does not occur from him. Such clients usually do not go to psychologists because of chronic lack of money.
This group also includes clients with mixed problems. For example, when a medical or psychiatric component is mixed with the psychological component.
Many existential problems also cannot be corrected, with the exception of rare cases. Such people are accompanied by depression, a lack of meaning in life, fatigue, sometimes physical illnesses and many related complications. Sometimes such patients are only helped by a spiritual approach based on an introduction to religion or the knowledge of the depths of their "I".