It happens that upon reaching a goal, a person is upset. Turns out he wanted something else. Hidden motives and unconscious goals that all people have have a great influence on events in life. To avoid disappointment, you must learn to control desires and unconscious impulses, as well as be able to identify the true goal.
Instruction manual
one
Sometimes it’s advisable to just ask: “What is your goal?”, “Why is this needed?” Ask the person or yourself questions about what will happen when the goal is realized. Is this really what you want? Specify what feelings and emotions you will experience at the same time. Imagine how life will change after the implementation of the goal.
2
Use clarifying questions. Try to imagine the nuances, small details, shape, colors, size, duration and other specific and tangible details with which you can imagine the goal more clearly. The sharper and more definite the result, the faster you will achieve what you want.
3
Pay attention to the second side of the coin. Often a person sees only the positive aspects of achieving a goal. In fact, almost any act or action can have unpleasant, shadowy aspects that you acquire along with what you want. Very often they are a traumatic factor in the psyche after reaching the goal. If you know about the second side of the coin initially, you can adjust the path to gaining the desired or the dream itself.
4
Focus on what you are doing, not on the conversation. Acts will show true goals better than words. You can dream and make plans, but you can’t hit a finger on a finger in order to realize your plan. If this is so in your life, then your thoughts do not have a real goal.
And, on the contrary, from actions you can understand the direction in which you are moving. If a woman declares that she wants to marry, but actually changes partners one by one, then the stated goal is not real.
5
Make a "goal tree". This is a structured scheme, where the end result will be at the top, and the place where you are right now is at the bottom. The branches of the tree will show the steps in achieving the desired or subgoal. Having made such a drawing, you will be able to see in more detail the ideal that you are striving for, to calculate the required forces and time for the realization of what was planned.
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Do something to achieve an intermediate goal. Track the result. If this is what you wanted, move on in that direction. This method will help to avoid mistakes and disappointments.