Sometimes you need to give advice to a friend, colleague or family member. This must be done carefully so that the person does not make a mistake and then does not blame you on it. Find out what rules are important for advisors to follow.
Instruction manual
one
First of all, it is necessary to understand the situation of a person well. If you decide to intervene and help him solve a problem, you need not to brush it off, but in fact offer an effective plan. Therefore, it is important to understand what the situation is, to understand all the circumstances. If you do not understand something, ask again, ask clarifying questions. In the end, you should have a good idea of what happened.
2
Try to be objective. It can be difficult to do this, especially if you really love and appreciate the person who came to you for advice. But understand that you need to be impartial to help a friend see the situation from the other side and to understand what is happening. If you fully accept his point of view and agree with his plan of action, in fact a person will not receive any advice from you.
3
Do not push on the person. Do not be too categorical. Your task is not to order, but to advise. Therefore, try to speak softly and friendly, and express your wishes in a recommendation form. You just let the person know about their own point of view. She will not necessarily be true. In addition, for all your insight, you cannot know all the details of the life of another person. Therefore, the last word should remain with the person himself, and not with you. Let him make a fatal decision on his own.
4
Refrain from reproaches and moralizing. If a person tells you about his problem, there is no need to say that he is to blame, and to learn how to act so that trouble does not happen. Accept this as a fact and focus not on chiding the person who addressed you, but on helping him. Your task is to offer one or several options for action, and not to shame a person.
5
Put yourself in the place of your friend or acquaintance. It is easy to advise a person to completely change their own habits, immediately break a hopeless relationship, quit, start a business from scratch. And first you think, if you yourself could have done such a bold act. Try the situation on yourself. Otherwise, recommending that you do the impossible, you are a little soul-catching.
6
If you see a solution to a problem and are confident in the effectiveness of your advice, help a person make sure that you are right. Give evidence or give some examples of how such actions helped other people cope with similar difficulties. Prove that your words are based on practice and experience.