People hate the lie and call it one of the most disgusting human qualities, but some often lie, even those who consider it unacceptable. Psychologists have long proved that every person lies at least several times a day. “I’m already driving up, ” you are lying on the phone, still very far from the meeting place. "Say that I am not, " - ask you to answer by phone when you do not want to talk. “You look beautiful, ” you are disingenuous to your friend’s question. So why do people lie?
Instruction manual
one
Often lies about trifles are a convenient way to get away from talking or discussing problems. Many psychologists believe that all problems need to be spoken, but just imagine what would happen if you always told the truth. You would spend a lot of time discussing minor details. True, if a person always only lies, fencing himself off from any sincere communication, this indicates the presence of big problems in his psyche - he is either afraid to speak openly with people, or despises them.
2
It happens that people lie, so as not to offend the interlocutor. A colleague shows you photos of his cat, and you say "what a dear", although you don’t think so at all and you hate cats at all. Or, mom gave you new kitchen curtains that you absolutely didn’t like. But you still say: "Thank you, very cool." Why offend mom? A friend cut her hair unsuccessfully, and you cheer her up - and you know, it’s even juicy to you. You are lying, maintaining social ties, and out of a desire to make people more pleasant.
3
Often a lie is an attempt to hide the real state of affairs or the desire to present oneself in the best possible way. As a rule, this does not end with anything good, since you know from childhood that everything secret becomes clear. In the end, your lies are revealed, and you find yourself in an even worse position. But at a time when it must be said honestly, it is sometimes so difficult to resist and not embellish reality. You are deceiving from cowardice to admit your failure, from fear to face the truth and be yourself.
4
A lie out of selfish motives is one of the most dangerous varieties of lies. To lie in order to get some benefit for yourself, using the trust of other people, manipulating their behavior - is disgusting. Such a calculated lie can destroy not only relationships, but also reputation. No matter how tricky such a mercenary liar might seem to himself, he eventually loses. People will lose respect for him.
5
There is another type of liar - a pathological liar. Sometimes people are simply unable to say a word of truth, they lie on completely innocent occasions, sometimes even to the detriment of themselves. Psychologists say that such behavior can be the result of childhood trauma and loneliness.