Betrayal of a partner is a serious test that can overshadow the mind of even the most sane person. To respond with treason to treason is to do it in spite, but first of all it turns out to spite itself, because the consequence of such a decision will be only one thing - it will become even more painful and unpleasant.
Instruction manual
one
They say that the first thoughts that appear are worth learning about treason, it is “Why? What have I done wrong? How could he / she?”, But in reality at first there are no thoughts at all, only shock and pain, from which everything is inside stones. Then comes the time of experiences and sobs, and it can last for everyone in different ways. Someone makes scandals and tantrums, someone hides and worries alone. Still others meet their best friend or girlfriend and share everything with a loved one.
2
At first it may not be clear whether it is worth continuing the relationship after what happened. Some cannot forgive treason. It is really difficult to do, and even if a person betrayed only once, he may not even return confidence. If you understand that this is your case, then perhaps you should leave, at least for a while, to think carefully about what happened and calm down. Someone decides to be together, no matter what. Often the reason is that a lot of people are connected together: living space in common ownership, small children who need to be raised together, something else
Situations are very different.
3
The inevitable reaction to treason is a deep resentment. A person learns that he was preferred by someone else, and it doesn’t matter whether this someone else is better or worse, the fact itself is important: neglected. The insult seems so big and unfair that I want revenge. And how can one take revenge in such a situation? Of course, only by changing too. But take your time, even if such thoughts come to mind. To answer the same is not an option. This behavior can drive you into even greater depression, because after the betrayal of a loved one, you also changed yourself.
4
If it was decided not to break off relations, but to stay together, then both partners should try by all means to establish something that was broken: mutual trust. But when the second rushes to change in response, then there is no question of any trust, people just try to offend and hurt each other as much as possible. If you feel that you are drawn into just such a relationship, flee from them, save yourself. This is a very unhealthy phenomenon that can cripple both you and your partner. The accumulating pain and resentment, mixed with dependence on new emotions, including negative ones, is an explosive and dangerous cocktail.
5
Jealousy and a sense of possessiveness prompt a person to change the response. You are in pain and think that the partner should feel the same way! But even if love is still strong, it’s better to just leave than to try to take revenge and behave on an “eye for eye” basis. Over time, any pain will pass, and the less it will be, the faster it will subside. Changing in response, a person falls to the level of the one who betrayed him, and this is also very painful. After such an act, people feel as if they slipped and fell into the mud. Cheating in response becomes an additional shock that causes another person trauma.