It turns out that every day we hide our feelings in ourselves, not letting others know what is happening to us. And no one can help us without understanding us correctly. And if they understand it wrong, then something explosive happens in the head. Because of what we break a lot of firewood.
Instruction manual
one
We sometimes do not know how to properly convey to the person the essence of what is important. And time after time we try to express what only our head understands. It is easy to state a problem. We just think a lot and at the same time do not take into account our own and others' feelings. Although everyone can understand everything, if we say from the heart and sincerely. We even quarrel over anything more often than if these were ordinary everyday problems.
2
It is important in each appeal or request to talk about feelings, paying attention to the situation that is in reality. Be it a simple request, it should in no case be heard as an order. And, of course, before or after you need to be grateful to the person.
3
Pride must be tempered, but sometimes it is so difficult to do. And we often say: "I’ll do it better myself, don’t interrogate!" So you did not even try to ask to be heard.
4
Of course, it is very important that you need to listen to the end. Not everyone knows in two words to convey the clarity of a situation.
5
Emotions must be kept, they always interfere and will interfere. Although for some, a serious conversation is already a problem. Therefore, never say these words. You can choose a number of the most mild: discuss, think.
6
In general, you always need to express thoughts together with feelings: "I am very tired, please help." And try not to say negatively: "I am very tired, can you help me?"
7
Avoid harsh words, this applies not only to mats, but also to transitions to personalities. It is advisable to say: "We need to decide, " but not like "You need to." Otherwise, disputes will begin about who owes to whom and who owes what.
Useful advice
Get away from swearing calmly. It is difficult to solve something completely through emotions.