There is hardly a person who would never feel offended. More often this feeling arises in relation to close people. Someone else can "give back" the answer, or simply not pay attention to the "crazy nonsense." When it comes to loved ones, everything is much more complicated. Resentment is self-annoyance or aggression. When negative feelings accumulate, an explosion occurs, a scandal that is destructive for both sides. How to manage this feeling and how to survive a grudge?
Instruction manual
one
Try to determine who you are offended by and why. Sometimes this is not easy, but awareness of the situation can provide psychological relaxation.
2
Talk to the offender. Tell us about your feelings about the situation. Be constructive, do not blame the interlocutor. Talk only about how you feel. During the conversation, you can develop a joint solution to the situation. If not, don't be discouraged. It will become easier for you if you speak "at the address".
3
If you are prone to revenge, consider whether the offender was punished for the act? If so, remember that the "stone in his garden" has already been cast. Find a feeling of satisfaction about this and keep in mind that the “return” ball can only be called once.
4
Avoid manipulation. Often people, especially women, use resentment to get what they want. Pouting lips and proud silence show: you did something wrong. Having achieved his goal, he is “offended” again in a good mood and is ready to communicate. This method remained from childhood when the child showed his mother what he needed. In adulthood, such behavior can be fraught and effective until others are aware of the game. If this method is typical for you, it will be difficult to get rid of it. This is the usual way to receive bonuses and dividends from others. Behavior changes only when you feel its inappropriateness.
5
If there is an old resentment, check if it causes negative emotions? If not, then this is just an experience that can be used for good. You must be aware that there are different situations in life, and be prepared for them.
6
If resentment provokes negative emotions, do a little exercise. Feel where exactly in the body this feeling "settled"? Try to colorize it in different colors and see which color suits the offense more? Give this feeling a form, volume, consistency, play with it. Then decide whether you need resentment in the body? If not, release it: burn it mentally or, putting it in a box, launch it into space.
7
If you strive for self-improvement, consider resentment as a gift. After all, this is an occasion to work on yourself. Think about why this feeling came about. Learn to track the sensations at the moment of their occurrence and respond constructively and instantly, without accumulating resentment bags.