Sometimes it is not easy to refuse a person, especially if he insists on your help. Sometimes a choice arises: to fulfill a person’s request, having received a lot of difficulties and problems, or to refuse and offend him.
Instruction manual
one
If there is a possibility of such a situation, think: why should the petitioner be offended by the refusal. After all, they usually ask for what people are not required to do. Therefore, being offended by refusal is stupid. Sometimes it happens that someone has provided a service and is waiting for a response step, and in fact this is a requirement, politely clothed in a request. In this case, the situation is more complicated, and the best solution is to not get into it, that is, not to accept services from a person who will find it difficult to repay you anyway. Just offer the person help in some other way. If you refuse, write it yourself in the negative and try to help in the future. And also draw conclusions so that you no longer get into unpleasant situations.
2
More often than not, a person who asks for something too persistently is an ordinary manipulator. There were no serious services on his part and most likely will not be. Just the fact that you helped him once, for him there is sufficient reason to contact you again. And so on to infinity, kindness is punishable. Sometimes you don’t want to explain the reasons for the refusal, and rightly so. This may give the applicant a reason to argue, and you may be forced to lie, which is unpleasant. Only the investigator has the right to force you to delve into the explanation of your personal circumstances, and even then in a limited number of cases. So do not complicate your life - they decided to refuse, refuse, without explaining anything in detail. Just say - I can’t, that’s enough.
3
To mitigate the failure, offer to help solve the problem differently. Say that you are happy to help, but you can’t do exactly as they ask in this situation. But you can help in a different way, and you will do it with pleasure. If the person who asks you respects your time and efforts, he will not be offended. And relationships with lovers to solve problems at the expense of others - not those relationships that you really need to protect.