Jealousy is one of the most excruciating and most ambiguous feelings experienced by man. Despite the self-evidentness of this phenomenon, psychologists find it difficult to give a clear definition, and their patients often do not know how to cope in a seemingly meaningless, but so intrusive state.
Instruction manual
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Ushakov’s dictionary interprets jealousy as “passionate incredulity, a painful doubt in someone’s fidelity, in love, in complete devotion.” So, almost always jealousy goes hand in hand with love. Some romantically inclined natures even like to cause this state in a partner, in order to make sure of the depth of his feelings. Other people don’t need a reason - they are jealous of themselves, and the slightest reason is enough for a flash of anger. From here you can see the second bunch of jealousy - with aggression, the desire to prove by force your right to possess a beloved object.
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Having delved into the history of human passions, one can notice the connection of human feelings with the principles of zoopsychology. In the animal kingdom, the concept of jealousy is practically absent - the female goes to the most powerful, dominant male. In a sense, if you close your eyes to the coarsening of terminology, this also applies to modern people: men and women tend to prove during courtship that they are good enough, worthy of their partner. But as soon as there is a reason to doubt it, here is where jealousy arises, a painful doubt as to whether he or she will find someone better for himself.
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If psychologists do not have a clear, academic definition of jealousy, then experts on human souls can offer methods of "treating" this ailment. First, work on your self-esteem. To believe in yourself, that you are worthy of your beautiful second half, is easy - because once you have already won his or her location. Return the elements of courtship to the relationship, then less time and mental energy will remain on suspicion and mistrust.
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Secondly (and this logically follows from the first point), build relationships on trust. If your partner intentionally flirts with other members of the opposite sex in order to make you jealous, frankly say that you do not like it. Perhaps the spouse did not mean anything bad at all, then it will be enough to specify the limits to which you can calmly look at his or her communication with other people.
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Third, redirect aggression. Yes, other people's attention to your other half is annoying. But on the other hand, the man whom others only dream of has given his heart to you. So laugh at yourself at unsuccessful competitors, and to make it easier, peel off a punching bag, imagining the face of an imaginary opponent.
Useful advice
Remember the main thing: you and your dear person are one team. Therefore, instead of tormenting him and yourself with unnecessary clarification of relations, think more often about your happiness and less cherish your suspiciousness.