Manipulators are very common. And those who depend on them suffer greatly from a similar attitude to themselves. Moreover, a person can be manipulated both at work and in his own family. Psychologists have developed a number of recommendations on how to prevent yourself from being mocked.
Instruction manual
one
If you try to manipulate through compliments, be very careful. It is so easy to relax from pleasant words, lose vigilance and once again agree to what is unpleasant and unacceptable to you. Therefore, when you hear flattering words, try not to blush and not be embarrassed. Just accept praise with dignity. After all, you value yourself! You can fix the result by answering your opponent with the same nice words. So he will understand that not too sincere compliments from you will not get anything.
2
In the case when you are presented with a choice, covering the main request with a preliminary story, do not rush to immediately give an answer. Manipulators like to put pressure on pity, so you run the risk of impulsively agreeing on things that are inconvenient for you. Feel free to ask for time to think. Left alone, carefully consider what you are asked for, weigh your opportunities and desires. And then decide whether you will help or not. Do not be afraid to refuse if it is inconvenient for you.
3
When the manipulator tries to “crush” you with intellect: it shows that it is more educated, wiser and more intelligent than you - do not be fooled. Often, under such a pretense of intelligence, there is a fairly “empty” person who does not have special knowledge, but uses only a certain set of blanks. Answer him the same. Learn some important dates, historical figures, and events. In a conversation with this type of manipulator, apply your knowledge. He, not expecting such a rebuff from you, is at a loss and will stop his attempts to manipulate you.
4
If you apply the method of increasing aggression, do not give in. Psychologists recommend that you do not calm the angry opponent. Only complete ignore. And the attempt at manipulation will end as quickly as it began. This is due to the fact that since there is no reaction, then there is no point in spraying.
5
In this case, you can go from the opposite. Be sure to touch the raging interlocutor with your hand, touch him on the shoulder or on the wrist. At the same moment, begin to build up an aggressive tone and manner of communication in relation to the interlocutor. From surprise, your attempt to manipulate will immediately stop.
6
Sometimes manipulation is hidden behind too fast pace of speech and talkativeness. In this case, do not try to stop the flow of words that is pouring on you. Just say just one sentence: "Sorry, I need to call urgently." And look back at the phone. This pause will help your interlocutor to lose pace and lose an advantage over you. Plus, you will still have the opportunity to figure out how to end the conversation.
note
To distinguish a sincere compliment from too much one can be easily enough. For this, pay attention to the filing form. If suddenly you become the best person (s) for a person, things cannot be disputed without you, etc., which means that they are trying to openly manipulate you.
Useful advice
If you feel that a person is trying to manipulate you right now, pause. Seconds of 5-6 will be enough. During this time, psychologists assure, your brain will have time to adapt to the proposed circumstances and will give you an answer whether you should fulfill such an order or request or not.
Of course, you need to learn to love and respect yourself. And then any attempts to manipulate you will be unsuccessful.
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How to protect yourself from manipulation